A story about a boy….

  • Evernote Camera Roll 20140624 154256When I was in middle school I lived in a tiny little town called Redmond, Oregon. I was overweight, not popular, didn’t play sports or really venture out of my shell at all. Several times a week I would walk from my school to my church and a bunch of us would hang out there after school to socialize, do homework and then have youth group later in the evening. EVERY single time I would stop by 7-11 on my way there and get a Super-Big-Gulp of regular Pepsi (512 cals, 128 grams of sugar) and a King Size Snickers bar (440 cals, 22g fat, 56g carbs). I was usually the first one there so I would eat my “snack” and wait for others to get there. I never really thought much about what I was putting in my body until someone there made a comment one day about how crazy it was that I ate that all the time. I was instantly embarrassed, kind of ashamed as well. I knew I was overweight and had major body issues. As a middle schooler I would avoid pools or sunny days, I’d avoid ANY situation that required me to take my shirt off.

    The shame grew from that day forward, so instead of waiting until I got to the church to eat my “snack” I would wolf it down on my short walk from the convenience store to the church, barely tasting it, just chewing and biting as fast as I can to get it in me before anyone could see me eating it. It’s amazing how one small comment (which was probably said in love just to inform me of how harmful that behavior could be) brought on so much guilt and shame that now instead of enjoying and savoring my snack, I was wolfing it down, hiding it from anyone who might see me. It wasn’t enjoyable anymore, it was habit, it was comfort, it was bigger than I could have imagined at the time.

    I realize now after spending years battling and studying food addictions and our behavior with food that I was using the king size snicker as comfort. Food stimulates the pleasure centers in our brain. When you mix that with our cultural significance to use food as a companion for every emotion, it’s easy to see why I effortlessly turned to food (almost junk food exclusively) as a way to cope and deal with my emotions. Looking back now it makes no sense why I would go eat a candy bar to comfort myself because I was upset that kids threw food at me in the cafeteria and called me fat, but to a 12 year old boy, it came very naturally……and that behavior escalated to even more extremes to the point when less than a decade later I was over 300lbs and in very bad shape, emotionally and physically.

    Why am I telling you this? Because I see the same exact behavior in so many adults all around the world. I have clients that deal with the exact same issue and I would bet one of you reading this right now suffers from something similar as well. Sure maybe it’s not sneaking king sized snickers bars (for some it might be) but for many of us we still DO turn to food as our coping mechanism for stress, anxiety, depression, loneliness, etc.

    My hope for those (and you if this sounds like you) is for us to identify this behavior and eventually stop this behavior, maybe not overnight, but to at least recognize it, and realize that we need to find an alternative way to emotionally deal with our stresses and life. Binge eating, emotional eating, etc. is a REAL problem and it will bury you (quite literally) if not handled and dealt with head on. My suggested first step is to simply think about it. Before diving into that food that you know is not the best for you, stop. Pick up a pen and paper and write down the answers to these questions:

    1. What am I feeling right now? What emotions are either heavy on me or possibly distant but still present with me right now?
    2. How will this food really help me with those emotions, what will it help or cure?
    3. If you truly listed a legitimate reason for answer #2, ask yourself, has that reason proven beneficial and healthy for you in the past?

    Don’t be surprised if answering #1 is a bit of a challenge. We naturally will find dozens of reasons to NOT handle our own emotions, to not truly deal with it. So trying to think about an emotion that is physically weighing down on you but you have suppressed vigorously so that you don’t have to actually deal with it can be challenging at first. Spend some time truly thinking about it, examining your thoughts and emotions is a great first step.

    I pray we will all find health in our lives, both physically and mentally, and it starts with taking action.

    *Jeremy Reid is a AFPA certified trainer and specializes in weight loss and muscle building. He has years of experience in working with clients battling eating disorders and working with them to combat those addictions. Although he’s not a licensed addiction specialist, his own personal experience and working with clients with eating disorders has equipped him with tools to guide his clients to a healthier way of thinking and living.


    June 24th, 2014 | Jeremy Reid | 3 Comments |

About The Author

Jeremy Reid

3 Responses and Counting...

  • Sara 06.24.2014

    This brought me to tears. I know all too well the shame that these eating habits and addictions can cause. Thank you for being so honest and congratulations on your transformation. Truly inspiring.

  • Hi Jeremy,
    Can’t believe this is you. Fantastic. Do get in touch, lots to tell you about Robbie, both of you in a similar business. How weird
    Regards
    Rosica

  • Wow! Very touching. .thank you for inspiring so many and sharing your story.

Leave a Reply

* Name, Email, and Comment are Required